3rd Blog Post
Luca: I am so down
I mean like sad
Nikki: Do you want to talk about it?
Luca: I dont
Mom: Luca, it's important we talk about things. It's ok to be mad at the
people we love. It is safe to say when you are mad at me.
Luca: Fine
Mom: I got frustrated with Luca today because he wouldn't type with me
during a zoom session with Katie. I know there are so many factors
impacting your ability to type, Luca, but I felt like you weren't even
trying. You were only typing "stim" words for an hour, and my patience
ran out.
Luca: I am trying
Mom: Then I'm sorry for getting frustrated. All I care about is that you
are trying.
Luca: I am just frustrated because I try to be a good son
Mom: You are a wonderful son, and I adore you.
Luca: I am trying to get you to rest
I want you to take a break from me
I just want you to rest
Mom: Are you sick of me? LOL. I'm sorry honey, I love you. I'm so happy
we can finally have dialogue about our frustrations.
Luca: I am sorry too
I love you too
I know you are doing a good job
I am sorry for all the stim
I am just tired
I am overwhellmed today
Nikki: Why?
Luca: It is so complicated
I am in a state of constant chaos
Nikki: Whoa, how does that feel?
Luca: it is uncomfortable
Mom: Can you describe what's going on?
Luca: I think it is all in my head
Mom: Can you explain?
Luca: I think about you and the future
It is sad
I don't know who will be there to take care of me
I know that no one lives forever
Mom: I plan to live another fifty years or so, so I'll be around a long
time still to continue to take care of you.
Luca: I want to be able to take care of myself
Mom: You have learned so many things in the last few months, you can get
there. And then after I die then Blake (his brother) wants to live with
you and make sure you're cared for.
Luca: I want to help take care of Blake
I just want to be a big brother
I am not a good brother
I cant do anything right
I just want to be a normal brother
Blake: You're a great brother. "Normal" brothers fight all the time and
we never do.
Luca: But I want to fight
I want to do normal brother things
Like go to a friends house
Or ride a skate board
I have a hard time with those things
I want to be a cool kid
I want to go with Blake
Nikki: Just because your bike and skateboard might look different,
different isn't bad or uncool. She then shares some of her experiences
that are similar to his frustrations.
Luca: I feel so much better now
I am so proud of you nikki
I love how interesting people are
I am interested in everyones life
You are interesting nikki
Luca: I need a life coach
I like living with a life coach kind of
I want to use this as this weeks post
I am ready to read what I typed
Original Reader Comments
Archived from the original Silent Superhero website. These historical comments are preserved as originally written and cannot be replied to individually here.
Hi Luca,
I love your blog! You are so inspirational to others. Thank you for sharing your struggle! You have found your voice; many kids I know have difficulty with that. Thank you for being a super hero to them; you have found your special power! You are bridging the gap of understanding for learners and helping those who haven’t found their voice yet. You are courageous! Please keep writing...I will keep reading!!
Love, Beth
Luca, I love this. You don’t realize it yet, but YOU are a life coach. This blog is great! You will inspire so many!
So interesting to read this Luca! Right now I feel like my world is in chaos too, and it feels overwhelming sometimes. We all understand how that feels and are here for you. Love you heaps, and so happy to hear you sharing about your life.
Hi Luca!
Wow! I am enjoying your blog post. Thanks for sharing it with us. It's so awesome to "hear" your words now. I am so excited for you and the family. I hope you'll keep your blog post going. You are seriously my super hero!! (Blake, too, you both are a super hero duo)
I love you!
Tia Maria
It’s so nice to hear your thoughts Luca. Thanks for sharing. I too want to be a good brother & son. You rock dude!
Oh my god you guys. I'm crying so much from reading this. I'm so touched and honored to be able to read this. Thank you from the depths of my heart. I love you all so much. Luca, you are so brave. And so loved.
Talking about my feelings helps me too!
You have a great heart.
What are stim words?
Brothers love is so deep normal has nothing to do with it. You are loved.
Thank you for sharing, Luca. Family relationships are tough. I feel ya!
And, you have a bike and skateboard?! I’d love to see a picture of it.
I love how this post was a dialogue. It’s fun to hear your thoughts and conversations with your family. You made me laugh when you said you needed a break from your mom. I’ve felt the same way, too.
Thanks for doing this Luca. I learned from you today.
I am so happy that that you are able to voice all that’s going on for you. Love reading about you and your life, Luca!
Hi Luca, Thank you for your new blog post. It brings up so many feelings for me. So many times I have wanted to be a different person or to do things that I can't. Sometimes I just have to ask for help, like you did. I saw the video of you skateboarding with Blake and I am so glad you got to do "brother" things with him. You are an inspiration! Please keep going with your blog posts. I check all the time and I am so happy to see you did another one!
Hi Luca! I just read through your blog and saw that when you were younger you thought God gave you special superpowers - I thought the same thing too and it comforted me when I had all kinds of troubles. (I still like to believe it's true - do you?) Your blog is awesome - I am so glad you found a way to express all the things inside. I can tell you are super smart... I look forward to reading more of your posts.
Luca and family, including Nikki... thank you for sharing and letting us see what it is like to share and express one's feelings. This is exactly what the world needs, more vulnerability so we can each see WE ARE NOT ALONE. We are never alone and no matter what happens, as long as we share with each other, we can build of circle of love that we can always turn to! Blake!... You do that so well! Always balancing your responsibilities and being there for your brother! There is so much you give and for him to know you are there... YOU are a gift! Mom and Dad... you have opened up a path in so many unselfish ways that led Nikki to Luca... and now look... we get to see the beginning of expression we have all been craving for, wanted to believe, and now we can learn from Luca. And Luca... to you our dear young man.... I know it takes a lot of effort and energy to get to where you are and share with us. Keep working hard so the world can learn from you. YOU inspire me! I am opening a home in the next few months to care for people with developmental disabilities and where they will be living all the time. You are teaching me so much about possibilities and I promise you... I will take care of them IN LOVE, with LOVE, and for LOVE. We all worry about things in life and our futures... but what we have is the power to see NOW. What we have NOW! So keep sharing with us because we need your wisdom which can teach all of us how we need to Care for People. All of us. Thank you for being such a bright light LUCA. We love you! And you are not alone! We all feel the same things. Let's do this!
JJ
What a brave example you have set for the rest of us.
Luca, you have encouraged me to try harder, to listen better, to smile more, and to take better care of myself.
I like having your words on my screen! Thank you,
Test comment
Sometimes I feel overwhelmed and wonder who will be by my side in the future too. You sound like a very good brother and son. I'm glad you can communicate and share your feelings.
I look forward to reading all your posts.
Hi Heidi,
Stim words are those words he reverts back to because they somehow are easier for him, or make him feel better somehow. He may type Elmo for example in the middle, or "sink", or "bye" at innapropriate times. We delete those as they come out, reset, start again.
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